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<channel>
	<title>Planning Your Finances Blog</title>
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	<link>http://reniacarsillo.net</link>
	<description>what you should know</description>
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		<title>Paying off debt &#8211; credit score</title>
		<link>http://reniacarsillo.net/paying-off-debt-credit-score/</link>
		<comments>http://reniacarsillo.net/paying-off-debt-credit-score/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 02 Dec 2012 14:11:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://reniacarsillo.net/?p=49</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Deborah X. Dates: Hello, My question is how will paying charge offs that are on my credit report affect my credit score? Some of these charge offs are as old as four years. I would like to know if paying them off or settling worth it at this point, since it has been so long. [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/paying-off-debt1.jpg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-51" style="margin: 0px 0px 10px 10px;" title="paying off debt" src="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/paying-off-debt1.jpg" alt="" width="120" height="121" /></a>Deborah X. Dates:</strong> Hello,</p>
<p>My question is how will paying charge offs that are on my credit report affect my credit score? Some of these charge offs are as old as four years.</p>
<p>I would like to know if paying them off or settling worth it at this point, since it has been so long.</p>
<p>If paying them off will increase my credit score, how long after making the payment before I will see the increase in my score? Thanks for all response in advance.<br />
<span id="more-49"></span><br />
<strong>Chloe said:</strong> Depends on the age of the debt also don&#8217;t pay it completely off without an agreement with the company that they will delete the account from your credit reports.</p>
<p>If you pay off the accounts without an agreement it will reflect negatively on your credit report for up to 7 years.</p>
<p>my sister made the mistake of doing that through consumer credit counseling. All her accounts have 0 balance but her FICO is still low because the accounts show that #1 &#8211; she was in a debt management program which is a RED FLAG, and #2 &#8211; they are updated as account settled or something like that. So it&#8217;s still a negative account. You need the accounts either REMOVED or shown as &#8220;Paid as Agreed&#8221;</p>
<p><strong>Tonny said:</strong> you can also send the creditors on the credit report a letter basically saying, this is X number of years old, would you please remove?  And usually if it is 4 years or older, they will remove it, because they don&#8217;t have the info on it any longer.</p>
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		<title>Mortgage Loan question</title>
		<link>http://reniacarsillo.net/mortgage-loan-question/</link>
		<comments>http://reniacarsillo.net/mortgage-loan-question/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 01 Nov 2012 23:16:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://reniacarsillo.net/?p=44</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Karolyn asked: Hi, I joined the group after the initial part of this discussion. We have a ARM that matures in May. Can ya explain what my options are for reducing debt? I.e.: refinance with fixed rate (will do if I have to, hate the appraisal process- ill and house needs cleaning and fixing up, [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/mortgage-loan.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-45" style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px;" title="mortgage loan" src="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/mortgage-loan.jpg" alt="" width="160" height="120" /></a>Karolyn asked:</strong> Hi,</p>
<p>I joined the group after the initial part of this discussion. We have a ARM that matures in May.</p>
<p>Can ya explain what my options are for reducing debt?</p>
<p>I.e.: refinance with fixed rate (will do if I have to, hate the appraisal process- ill and house needs cleaning and fixing up, would have to hire someone- will do it if necess- but wondered what my other options are)</p>
<p>What steps would I need to Take? Thanks for any help</p>
<p>K in NW FL<br />
<span id="more-44"></span><br />
<strong>prettyone:</strong> -FYI, when you refinance, the cleanliness of a house is not an issue in the appraisal.. They are taking the location value, structural value into account.</p>
<p>They are assuming that you will clean if you sell. So don&#8217;t worry about the appraisal.</p>
<p><strong>Smith answered:</strong> Hi K,</p>
<p>If you are planning to stay in your home, I would Re-fi to a fixed rate mortgage. I would contact your current lender about your intentions and see if they have a reasonable low fee re-fi option. You may want to check how often your loan will adjust. With the lowering of interest rates by the Fed, it may not be a huge hardship when it does adjust. Is there a reason you went with an adjustable rate to begin with? Are you in a home you can&#8217;t afford? If that is the case, you may need to do those repairs needed and get out of the house.</p>
<p>As for the appraisal process, unless you have a huge hole in your roof, sagging gutters or a green swimming pool, I would not be too concerned about the appraisal. If your home is generally in the same condition it was when you purchased, it should appraise out fine. Appraisals are based on comparable home sales in your area, size of your home and upgrades lastly into the equation. I would clean up and fix up for your own satisfaction and piece of mind, not because you are having your house appraised. A lot of times on re-fis, lenders may only do a &#8220;drive by&#8221; appraisal and may not even come inside your home.</p>
<p>Hope this helps!</p>
<p>val added: Your house should be suitably clean. Otherwise the appraiser might think you&#8217;ve ignored the needed repairs of your house that aren&#8217;t visible. As long as it doesn&#8217;t look like you&#8217;re the proud owner of a garbage dump, you should do just fine.</p>
<p>Kenny: Because housing prices are going way down, there is a possibility of your house appraising for less than you owe. I&#8217;m not sure of your situation, but if this is the case, you won&#8217;t be able to refinance, without putting up the difference. You can always call your bank and tell them your situation and maybe they will work with you. I have heard of some bank programs helping get people into more traditional loans in cases like these. So I would suggest just calling or meeting someone at your bank.</p>
<p>Also, I am a licensed Realtor and even though I don&#8217;t do appraisals, I am familiar with the process. They do not give your house a value based on any repairs that you need to make. Now if your house is falling apart and it&#8217;s very noticable, it may have an ill effect on the way they appraise it. But it is usually based on location, square footage, year built and size of lot.</p>
<p><strong>R McKey:</strong> I missed the original question here, but I am a RE Appraiser. And will offer any information I can. Right now the way most mortgage companies I am working with require appraisers to list any necessary repairs at the time of the inspection. Most maintenance items, minor items do not count. If there is damage (rotten wood, peeling paint, missing flooring, etc) these items are supposed to be listed with a cost to cure. From what I have seen, if the cost to cure is under 5% of the total value of the home, no adjustments are made and the mortgage company does not &#8216;require&#8217; these things to be done &#8211; I&#8217;m sure each bank/lender has their own method.</p>
<p>The market I am working in is good, still increasing for the most part, but I work with some national companies and know the market is not the same else where. Yes appraisals are based on location/lot, price per square foot, age, amenities, etc. Also most mortgage companies require the comparables to be closed sales with the past 6 months (12 max) and under one mile in proximity (and that changes based on how populated the area is).</p>
<p><strong>Ret added:</strong> I would refinance to a fixed rate if you can. An arm that matures can double or go even higher in most cases.</p>
<p>Its either that or have your payment skyrocket up&#8230;Can you afford a payment double the amount of what your paying now? Pretty much the only option you have is get a fixed loan or pay off the loan in cash.</p>
<p>which I doubt you can do. My suggestion if you pick a fixed rate and you can afford it is get a 15 year fixed if you can.. Good luck!! MIke</p>
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		<title>Newbie &#8211; over my head and sinking fast</title>
		<link>http://reniacarsillo.net/newbie-over-my-head-and-sinking-fast/</link>
		<comments>http://reniacarsillo.net/newbie-over-my-head-and-sinking-fast/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 10 Oct 2012 19:47:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://reniacarsillo.net/?p=40</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dvine Angel: Hi everyone. I am a married mother of one, I work full time and I also receive some disabilty from the military. I am in tons of debt (credit cards, auto loans, personal loans, car loans, tax debt, medical bills, store credit, etc, ect). Almost everything is in collections and I&#8217;m so afraid [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/tons-of-debts.jpg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-41" style="margin: 0px 0px 10px 10px;" title="tons of debts" src="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/tons-of-debts.jpg" alt="" width="125" height="120" /></a>Dvine Angel:</strong> Hi everyone. I am a married mother of one, I work full time and I also receive some disabilty from the military.</p>
<p>I am in tons of debt (credit cards, auto loans, personal loans, car loans, tax debt, medical bills, store credit, etc, ect). Almost everything is in collections and I&#8217;m so afraid to answer my phone, it&#8217;s making me physically ill.</p>
<p>I am seriously considering bankruptcy because I don&#8217;t see how I can ever pay off the debt I have AND pay my bills and household expenses. Any advise? I have the only income in the house (about $51000.00 before taxes). I hope I&#8217;m not giving too much info and I hope I&#8217;ve given enough.<br />
<span id="more-40"></span><br />
I am SO in need of guidance that it is rediculous. I just don&#8217;t know what to do anymore. Any help or advise is appreciated and wanted. Thank you in advance.</p>
<p><strong>Jimmy said:</strong> Dvine,  Can you do me a favor and give me a break down of your budget, just to see where you are at every month&gt;?  You have great income for the month, so just curious where it is all going for each bill?</p>
<p>Maybe we can give you some advice and head you in the right direction&#8230;  Let us know ASAP!!!  That&#8217;s what we&#8217;re here for.</p>
<p>Just list the balance and minimum payment for each bill, including your fixed bills like mortgage/rent, utilities, car ins&#8230;etc&#8230;  Would love to help you and see what best options you have ok???</p>
<p>I cant remember if I responded to you before or not&#8230;One thing Ive realized is that it probably took years to get in the predicament that you are in, and it will take you years to get out of it.</p>
<p>You said you are married?  Sit down with one another and lay all your bills out and see where you are at with money coming in and money going out!</p>
<p>Begin to plan a budget&#8230;.Look at paying the most important things first..house, electricity, gas, necessities first&#8230;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
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		<title>Hey there newbie seeking advice</title>
		<link>http://reniacarsillo.net/hey-there-newbie-seeking-advice/</link>
		<comments>http://reniacarsillo.net/hey-there-newbie-seeking-advice/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 15 Sep 2012 11:18:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://reniacarsillo.net/?p=36</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Hi, My name is Heather and I guess there are a lot of people in debt like me hu? Well I&#8217;m in a big fix and I was hopeing to find some advice. A little about my situation: I&#8217;m 21 and a single mom, I&#8217;m not able to work for health reasons right now and [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/debt2.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-37" style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px;" title="debts" src="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/debt2.jpg" alt="" width="119" height="160" /></a>Hi,</p>
<p>My name is Heather and I guess there are a lot of people in debt like me hu? Well I&#8217;m in a big fix and I was hopeing to find some advice. A little about my situation:</p>
<p>I&#8217;m 21 and a single mom, I&#8217;m not able to work for health reasons right now and am relying on my Disabled Mom and Dad to help me out. I lost my apartment and everything I owned when I was 20 and trying to go to college in Illinois because I had several studant loans and went through an id theft to boot. My natural mom (I&#8217;m adopted) took out about $18,000 worth of credit out on me and that&#8217;s made it impossible to get any kind of debt consolidation loan. Anyway, I ended up pregnant and now have an 18 mth old little.<br />
<span id="more-36"></span><br />
I was fortunate enough to get accepted back into school but can&#8217;t get any financial aid until my debt is resolved with the collection agencies. I need about $35,000 to do this but with no income of my own, the worst credit, and no collateral I feel like I&#8217;m in a strait jacket waiting for the wolves to pounce. please if you have any suggestions, I&#8217;d do anything, I&#8217;d sell my soul to get this fixed!!!</p>
<p><strong>Zender added:</strong> Hello:</p>
<p>If your mom got credit cards in your name without your permission call the credit card companies and tell them this.</p>
<p>The credit card companies cannot hold you responsible for charges you did not make. You may have to send them a notarized statement to this effect. If the other money owed are student loans, call the student loan companies and ask for a hardship deferment.</p>
<p>The loan companies will suspend your payments for  a few months to a year or so.</p>
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		<title>Debt Settlement &#8211; Got Questions</title>
		<link>http://reniacarsillo.net/debt-settlement-got-questions/</link>
		<comments>http://reniacarsillo.net/debt-settlement-got-questions/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 20 Aug 2012 03:17:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://reniacarsillo.net/?p=32</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Cat asked: Let me start off by introducing myself. I&#8217;m from Georgia. Married and mom to 2 kids. I have 2 CC debts totaling just under $18,0000. American Express @ 11.24% $10,500 BofA LOC @ 19.99% $ 7423 I&#8217;m not behind on any of my payments, but I&#8217;m exploring the option of debt settlement. How [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/debt-settlement.jpg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-33" style="margin: 0px 0px 10px 10px;" title="debt settlement" src="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/debt-settlement.jpg" alt="" width="120" height="157" /></a>Cat asked:</strong> Let me start off by introducing myself. I&#8217;m from Georgia. Married and mom to 2 kids. I have 2 CC debts totaling just under $18,0000.</p>
<p>American Express @ 11.24% $10,500</p>
<p>BofA LOC @ 19.99% $ 7423</p>
<p>I&#8217;m not behind on any of my payments, but I&#8217;m exploring the option of debt settlement. How is it done? What are the right questions to negotiate a settlement? etc&#8230;</p>
<p>I&#8217;m expecting to have $6500 by April 1st or so. Some advice would help.</p>
<p>Thank you in advance.<br />
<span id="more-32"></span><br />
<strong>Benny:</strong>  found a decent letter for debt settlement at a online forum, not sure the proper % to try to settle for, maybe start with 40% of the debt and see what they say.</p>
<p><strong>Ethan said:</strong> Cat,   I don&#8217;t know if anyone responded back to you or not so Im going to lol.  I have only read books on debt settlement, so by no means am I an expert ok.  I haven&#8217;t gone through it so this is based on everything I&#8217;ve read.  Debt settlement companies usually help out people who have been extremely late on their payments and who are trying to get a settlement for a percentage of what they owe.</p>
<p>For example if somebody had 10K in cc Unsecured debt and a few others which haven&#8217;t been paid in over 5 months, then a debt settlement company can help in one huge way.  The debt settlement company basically charges the individual for reducing the debt with the company setting up a payoff amount of usually 40-50% less of what you owe, which in this case would be 5K.  The reasons why CC companies do this is because at least they can get something instead of nothing because with an unsecured CC there is nothing tied to the debt, like a car loan, house loan or any other installment loan.  So something is better than nothing.</p>
<p>Now in your situation you haven&#8217;t been late on any of your payments, so I don&#8217;t think you have a very good chance of settling any debt when you have no problem paying them.  On the other hand you may be considering a Consolidation Loan, where both are combined at a lower interest rate but for longer terms or years&#8230;.  In this case your monthly payment is much lower, but you actually pay more in interest because the loan is for years longer.  Dave RAmsey says a Consolidation Loan is a &#8220;Con&#8221;, so don&#8217;t do it. I would pay these debts yourself and start knocking out the smallest debt first.</p>
<p>Take everything you can and pay that off then work on the big one.  If your getting a nice chunk of money here soon just pay off the first smallest bill.  It&#8217;s easier to do it yourself and you don&#8217;t have to pay anyone any money for something you can do yourself.  The 11.24% larger CC isn&#8217;t that bad of an interest rate.</p>
<p>You&#8217;d be surprised by cutting stuff out of your budget how much money you can put towards that money.  Have you done a budget every month?  Do you know what you have coming in and going out each month?  If you don&#8217;t try and see what it breaks down to, most people have no clue what they have coming in or going out.  Do you have high car payments, cut cell phones, turn off more lights saving electricity, food is a huge expense for most families, coupons, eating out most of the time can add up, etcc&#8230;  anything you can cut out temporarily to put more money towards your debts?</p>
<p>If you have any more questions, feel free to ask, I&#8217;d be glad to help you out.  Your situation doesn&#8217;t look bad at all.</p>
<p><strong>Aiden asked:</strong> I am confused&#8230; you can make your payments without an issue but you still want to get your debt erased.?</p>
<p>First off, If you are not having an issue making your payments then you need to start by creating a budget so you know where all your money is going.  Then attack one of your cards at a time to eliminate them all togehter, this will keep your credit in good standings.</p>
<p>If you are making your payments on time then religously every six month call the CC company and ask for a rate reduction. Tell them you are considering several balance transfer deals you have in front of you but want to see what they can do for you. Every reduction you get will help you pay off more faster, reducing your interest load.</p>
<p>I have never had experience with a company that helps with debt settlement, but I would imagine third party involement is going to get your cards cancelled.</p>
<p>Is it worth that.? I dont think it is. Not especially when you can put together a simple but powerful stradegy to just eliminate it by yourself.</p>
<p>But those are my 2 thoguhts for the day.</p>
<p><strong>Alex added:</strong> Cat,</p>
<p>You cannot do a debt settlement unless you are way behind on your payments and understand that it will negatively affect your credit score.  You should berate these cc companies about lowering your interest rate.  If the person on the phone does not agree, ask for a supervisor and if needed, ask for their supervisor.</p>
<p>If, come April, you have the $6,500, your Bank of UnAmerica bill should be down below 7k.  Call them and tell them you want a lower rate or you are closing the account and paying it off.  Once they lower it, send them the $6,500 and get it gone quick.</p>
<p>That&#8217;s my suggestion.</p>
<p>Good Luck to you.</p>
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		<title>new here and in over my head</title>
		<link>http://reniacarsillo.net/new-here-and-in-over-my-head/</link>
		<comments>http://reniacarsillo.net/new-here-and-in-over-my-head/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 29 Jul 2012 12:58:32 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://reniacarsillo.net/?p=27</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Hi! I am in debt. very seriously in debt )to the tune of $100LK). I was barely managing till last summer then I started missing payments. I am not constantly called at work and at hone. One CC has dropped me to a collection agency. what do I do? I have avoided all the calls [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/debt.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-28" style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px;" title="debt" src="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/debt.jpg" alt="" width="135" height="120" /></a>Hi!</p>
<p>I am in debt. very seriously in debt )to the tune of $100LK). I was barely managing till last summer then I started missing payments. I am not constantly called at work and at hone. One CC has dropped me to a collection agency. what do I do? I have avoided all the calls cuz what do I tell them&#8230;.I have no money to give anyone right not.</p>
<p>some cards I am OK with&#8230;.up to date and sending minimums in each month. I&#8217;m up to date with my car. I&#8217;m up to date with my house. but about 4-5 card I am behind in.</p>
<p>share your wisdom with me&#8230;.please.</p>
<p>thanks!</p>
<p>ceci<br />
<span id="more-27"></span><br />
<strong>Mason said:</strong> Hi Ceci,  WElcome to the group&#8230;Can you break down all the debt for us, what it is how much you owe on each one, interest rates, basically a break down of what you have coming in each month and how much is due at every month&#8230;If it took you a while to get in debt it&#8217;s going to take you a while to get out of debt.</p>
<p>We will most certainly try to help you out best we can. Any car payments, utility payments, etc&#8230;  Getting on a strict budget and understanding where every penny is going is the most important first step in taking charge of your situation&#8230;</p>
<p>If you haven&#8217;t done it before now is the time, then we&#8217;ll talk through it with you.  Are you married or single?  Any kids?  Let us know everything including mortgage or rent payments as well&#8230;.Talk to you soon and hang in there ok..</p>
<p><strong>George added:</strong> Ceci,</p>
<p>What is your monthly take home and list all of your out going and we will see if we can make some recomendations.</p>
<p><strong>Daniel said:</strong> I tell them I have no money but they don&#8217;t listen to that.  They are just programmed to get money and make &#8220;arrangements.&#8221;</p>
<p>I believe others have a more precise way of doing this but as I understand what people have said on this list, you tell the caller you will not discuss it on the phone and then you write a letter telling them to stop calling you.</p>
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		<title>new / feeling despair / bankruptcy recommended</title>
		<link>http://reniacarsillo.net/new-feeling-despair-bankruptcy-recommended/</link>
		<comments>http://reniacarsillo.net/new-feeling-despair-bankruptcy-recommended/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 11 Jun 2012 12:38:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://reniacarsillo.net/?p=24</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Nino: Hi everyone &#8211; I joined this group a week or so ago, looking for some ideas. Over the last 2 years, I&#8217;ve sunk more and more into debt, for many reasons. Add a 20% pay cut over a year ago, and I feel like I&#8217;m about to sink under! Today seemed like an all [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/bankruptcy-recommended.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-25" style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px;" title="bankruptcy recommended" src="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/bankruptcy-recommended.jpg" alt="" width="160" height="108" /></a>Nino:</strong> Hi everyone &#8211; I joined this group a week or so ago, looking for some ideas. Over the last 2 years, I&#8217;ve sunk more and more into debt, for many reasons. Add a 20% pay cut over a year ago, and I feel like I&#8217;m about to sink under!</p>
<p>Today seemed like an all time low. I contacted one of the credit places that offers to help organize and pay off all your debts, and after going through income, expenses and bills, they basically recommended bankruptcy! I do NOT want to do this. I went through bankruptcy in 1994, and spent many years rebuilding my credit, and am so upset to be in this situation.</p>
<p>After crying for a while, I am considering closing our some money I set aside for my kids&#8217; college. I can take the money out in April, if I can hang on until then. It&#8217;s so depressing to raid this funds, but if the alternative is bankruptcy&#8230;&#8230;.I don&#8217;t want to do that. Once I&#8217;m out of debt, I can built their funds back up, right?<br />
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I also cancelled my cleaning service (my one luxury I&#8217;ve been allowing myself) and my Curves membership, between that it should save close to $200 a month. And, came to the realization that I could not afford one of the trips that I&#8217;d planned this year, so cancelled that as well.</p>
<p>It&#8217;s so dark sometimes being under this heavy load of debt. I will see what else I can trim down in the budget, and hopefully in the two years, I can get out from under.</p>
<p>Help!!</p>
<p><strong>Boydda:</strong> Nino, you said you cancelled one of the trips you had planned for this year. Do you have more than one trip planned? If so, you probably need to cancel any and all of them that aren&#8217;t absolutely necessary. As you know, bankruptcy is serious business and if avoiding means no traveling, then you might want to consider no traveling.</p>
<p>Just my opinion!</p>
<p><strong>Nino added:</strong> Just one other trip, a family wedding, that is mostly paid for.</p>
<p><strong>Karolina replied:</strong> Hi Nino,</p>
<p>I can fully understand how overwhelming being in debt is. I was once there too. I noticed you mentioned that you&#8217;ve been through bankruptcy before and don&#8217;t wish to go through it again&#8230; if you are close to this situation in your life yet again, then maybe it&#8217;s time to look a little deeper as to why it is happening.</p>
<p>When I was in debt, and came to the harsh realization that it was fully my responsibility&#8230; in order to pay it all off, I had to break away from some old attitudes I had about spending money. It took me a long time to gain a healthy priority about when, on what and how much of my hard earned money I would spend.</p>
<p>You may not have to file for bankruptcy again, you can however reprioritize your spending habits. Doing this while you are paying off that debt (it may take a long time) might change your outlook on a very many things about life. Thats what happened for me. I&#8217;ve been debt free for close to 6 years now. I have some other problems in life to ovrcome now, but I can wake up each morning knowing that I&#8217;m living well within or even below my means.</p>
<p>Keep getting as much advice from this group&#8230; and maybe even off the group. Don&#8217;t let the debt problem take over your health and well being.</p>
<p>It is a very solvable problem.</p>
<p><strong>Nino also added:</strong> Thanks, Karolina. I do see what I did to get myself into this situation, and am determined to get through it, pay everything I owe, and get into a savings plan and pay cash lifestyle.</p>
<p>I am very anxious and stressed about the whole situation, it&#8217;s hard not to, and it is definitely affecting my sleep and other things right now. I think in a year things will be better, as I have some opportunities for additional money coming in, but right now.</p>
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		<title>Debt and New Relationships</title>
		<link>http://reniacarsillo.net/debt-and-new-relationships/</link>
		<comments>http://reniacarsillo.net/debt-and-new-relationships/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 17 Apr 2012 01:04:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://reniacarsillo.net/?p=20</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Artsy sent his question: Hello everyone, I don&#8217;t know if this is the right forum for this question, but I&#8217;ll ask it, and the moderators can of course not post it if it&#8217;s off topic for this group. I am interested in feedback about debt and dating. I got back into dating just over a [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/debt-new-relationships.jpeg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-21" style="margin: 0px 0px 10px 10px;" title="debt and new relationships" src="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/debt-new-relationships.jpeg" alt="" width="150" height="161" /></a>Artsy sent his question:</strong> Hello everyone,</p>
<p>I don&#8217;t know if this is the right forum for this question, but I&#8217;ll ask it, and the moderators can of course not post it if it&#8217;s off topic for this group.</p>
<p>I am interested in feedback about debt and dating. I got back into dating just over a year ago. I have done some dating, and am seeing one man regularly who lives about 3 hours away.</p>
<p>My financial situation was at its worst all last year, my second year of home ownership, after I&#8217;d taken on home improvement loans. Then came the inevitable unexpected needed repairs, and I got behind. My financial life has never been great &#8211; for 20 years I pursued a career as an opera singer, but never &#8220;made it&#8221;. Luckily I did find computers, and have done well with that (big leap in income). But I have always overspent my income to be able to fund my &#8220;art&#8221;. A couple of years ago I gave up opera all together, and now I&#8217;m a computer geek instead (lol).<br />
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The problem is that the man I am dating is well off financially. I have never told him about my financial situation because I&#8217;m afraid he&#8217;ll think I&#8217;m asking him to pay for everything.</p>
<p>Whether or not this relationship goes anywhere, the problem would be the same with any new relationship. I have dated other men as well, including one here in my area &#8230; and he has also done very well financially!</p>
<p>I feel so embarrassed about my situation, especially at my age, every time I see either of them. Both gentlemen are pretty free to do as they please, and able to retire fairly young.</p>
<p>I have been very careful to pay my share of dinners, entertainment, etc. I&#8217;ve never let on to either one that things are so tight for me.</p>
<p>Should I just forego dating for another year until I can get my finances back under control? If nothing else, I really can&#8217;t afford entertainment (travel, restaurants, etc.) right now anyway!</p>
<p>I&#8217;ll always have to work, and don&#8217;t even know if I&#8217;ll be able to retire at the regular age. What will people I meet think of me for getting to this stage of my life with this kind of uncertainty? Should I not tell them unless the relationship becomes serious? But if I wait, what will they think of me for having waited and then springing it on them later on?</p>
<p>Any perspective on this topic that anyone could offer would be so greatly appreciated.</p>
<p>Regards,<br />
Artsy</p>
<p><strong>Ethan answered:</strong> honesty is always the best policy.  You have to make it clear you are NOT asking for them to pay, but explain that your financial situation is dicey right now, you are trying to fix it, etc.  Surprises down the line are always much worse than up front.</p>
<p><strong>Mike added:</strong> Hi Artsy,</p>
<p>That is a very interesting topic to bring up.  I think so many people get into relationships and don&#8217;t think about talking about finances at all.  I give you credit for trying to work out your finances and pay for part of dinner or a movie, to me that is class. It&#8217;s not like your expecting a man to pay for everything and be a free ride.  I don&#8217;t think you have to stop dating, have fun and enjoy the companionship if you are interested in each other.  If the topic ever comes up when you get more serious then just be honest with him.  Your fine..I understand where your coming from though.  I would be surprised if any man would dump a woman who isn&#8217;t perfectly financially set&#8230;But if they do oh well&#8230;it wasn&#8217;t meant to be with him anyways in my opinion.</p>
<p>How are you doing with your finances right now? Are you heading in the right direction?  Are you on a plan or budget?  There are alot of people in this world that struggle with money at a later age, trust me your not the only one.  So don&#8217;t be so hard on yourself&#8230; The key is to be going in the right direction and know what you have to do to get there.  ARe you on a Dave RAmsey plan of some sort?</p>
<p>Theres nothing wrong with being a computer geek I guess lol.  Thats too bad you weren&#8217;t able to pursue a career in opera singing&#8230;I believe things happen for a reason.  Hang in there hun, and keep your head high..  Good luck&#8230; Mike =)</p>
<p><strong>Sophia commented:</strong> I don&#8217;t think you have to give all your financial details in the beginning of a relationship.  I think after 3 dates of paying your own way (or at least offering), you can tell him that money is tight and would he mind doing some less expensive things (you make him dinner at home, etc.).  If the relationship becomes exclusive and starts to get more serious, then I would come &#8220;clean&#8221;.</p>
<p>And don&#8217;t be surprised&#8230;when I met my husband I was making twice as much as he.  He figured I was rolling in dough.  However, I had $10k in cc debt and just living paycheck to paycheck.</p>
<p><strong>Stamen also said:</strong> Hi Artsy</p>
<p>Thanks for sharing your story which is human and beautiful. Since I&#8217;m in an arsty field myself, I can understand your situation. I actually am averse to dating. But you seem to like it and do it well. Why not be sincere about your situation with these men? Just ask them to go to modest places for dinner, so that paying your share is not going to strain you. As a former opera singer, you probably enjoy going to the Opera, Ballet and the like, which is expensive, so I feel for you.</p>
<p>I think being honest is the best approach. People find ways to reciprocate in dating where it does not have to be 50/50. When there is disparity in financial situations, I think people understand and can adjust. But since you&#8217;re good at dating, I would continue doing so, just be more modest about what you chose to go do.</p>
<p>Cheers, A</p>
<p><strong>Artsy concluded:</strong> Thank you, Thomas and Tracy.  Now I think of it, I can imagine that if positions were reversed, I would definitely appreciate the honesty up front also.  Have a great weekend, Artsy</p>
<p><strong>Mia said:</strong> I would not delve deeply into your financial picture with these people unless it is a serious relationship.  If you are getting married and need to discuss it BEFORE walking down the aisle, then I would keep the bulk of the information to myself.</p>
<p>You can tell them up front that you can not afford to do _________ (go to that concert) this week, as your finances don&#8217;t allow for buying the tickets right now, and you prefer to pay your own way.  &#8220;No, Steve, I can&#8217;t afford to go away for a week in ABC Resort right now.  Maybe some other time.&#8221;  If they want to pay your way, and you are comfortable accepting their gift of generosity, then go and enjoy yourself.</p>
<p>You don&#8217;t need to tell them about the $65,000 credit card debt, until you need to merge finances.  Even if you marry and keep things separate, you should reveal your financial picture, as should he, before marriage.  If the relationship is not at that point, I would not go there.</p>
<p><strong>Alexander objected:</strong> I&#8217;m not going to go into all of the history, but I hate learning something down the line.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m Tracy, and when my hubby and I got together, I was coming out of a very nasty situation.  My mother is a SERIOUS gambling addict&#8230;she stole, wrote bad checks, fraudently obtained checking accts to write bad checks, forged my name, etc, etc.</p>
<p>I was very upfront when we got together with what was going on.  I know that if I had gotten seriously involved and then sprung it on him, it could very well have been the end of our relationship.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m not saying you have to go into details, but explain the last few years have been rough, and money is tight, and that you have a plan to fix it&#8230;.that way, it doesn&#8217;t come across later as you were trying to hide something to get something over on him.</p>
<p><strong>Artsy added:</strong> Hi,</p>
<p>Thank you so much for your understanding and for helping me gain perspective. I think I was feeling overwhelmed by guilt.  I am on a plan to pay my debts down (my own plan, worked out with individual creditors), and am on the way.  I need to keep strong and positive to keep going because it will take awhile, and, as you mentioned, the emotional aspect of these issues can be a hindrance.  I knew I came to the right place for help and support when I joined this group!</p>
<p>I have read the postings about Dave Ramsay, and one other (can&#8217;t recall the name at the moment) and am going to look into both.</p>
<p>Thank you again for helping me go forward!</p>
<p>Regards,<br />
Artsy.</p>
<p><strong>Then Artsy added:</strong> Thank you so much for your advice.  That sounds very sensible and reasonable.  I think one can probably sense when the time arrives when it&#8217;s appropriate to bring the subject up.</p>
<p>Combining the advice of everyone who responded, I think I would be very upfront from the beginning about what I can afford to do and what I can&#8217;t afford to do.  That is, if someone wants to take a trip to Paris (I&#8217;m exaggerating), I would definitely tell them I don&#8217;t have the wallet for that, and that I would want to pay my share of any trip we&#8217;d take together.  So right away they&#8217;d know my relative financial situation.  I wouldn&#8217;t even mind telling them what my annual salary is at that point.</p>
<p>Then, later on, if things get serious, because we would be discussing a future together, they&#8217;d have to know my financial status in more detail, so they&#8217;d know what I&#8217;m dealing with long-term.</p>
<p>BTW &#8211; not sure if you were using the $65,000 just as a random number, but I do not have $65,000 in cc debt &#8230;</p>
<p>Right now cc debt is at $7,000.  Some cards are very small limits ($300) and I&#8217;ve already paid off two (I think paying the small balances first, then a pyramid payment plan is Ramsey&#8217;s plan??).  This week I will pay the other cards, and hopefully by middle of next month will have another chunk paid on all my cards.</p>
<p>I also have $25,000 in home improvement loans, and have paid 2 years into those debts (3 years to go till those loans are paid off).  Interest rate on one is great, bad on the other two.</p>
<p>I do not currently have a car loan, though my &#8217;97 Mercury just cost me almost $1000 to fix!  But I also have to say, I&#8217;ve had it 10 years, and this is the first time I&#8217;ve had to spend any significant amount on it at all.  So it&#8217;s been really good.  This is the second used car I&#8217;ve gotten from this dealership, and neither car has given me a minute&#8217;s trouble.  This car now has 83,000 miles on it and I hope to keep it at least another year.</p>
<p>I bought a house two years ago, and owe $110,000 on my mortgage.</p>
<p>In addition, I am getting my Master&#8217;s degree in IT, and will graduate end of this year.  I am going to school completely online, so I only have tuition for my student loans and no other college expenses.  Still, I am nervous about when those payments hit and am working on consolidation.</p>
<p>Right now, I don&#8217;t have any emergency funds.  I do have disability insurance through work, and all my loans (including mortgage) have insurance plans on them in case I am unable to work.</p>
<p>Last year, unexpected home repairs made me get overextended, and I got into the payday loan trap (thank goodness that&#8217;s over, and I will never ever do it again!) and bled money on the interest payments.  The domino effect was terrible.  Ugh.</p>
<p>Now I am working on getting and staying current with everything, and hopefully after 12 months I can refinance my mortgage for a better rate.</p>
<p>I do have a 401k, though it&#8217;s not matching, and am saving a small amount.  My current employer has a pension plan, and I also have a vested pension plan from a former employer.</p>
<p>That&#8217;s pretty much my financial picture!</p>
<p>Thank you again, everyone, for providing so much excellent and helpful advice!</p>
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		<title>Credit Score and Relationships</title>
		<link>http://reniacarsillo.net/credit-score-and-relationships/</link>
		<comments>http://reniacarsillo.net/credit-score-and-relationships/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 10 Mar 2012 11:38:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

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		<description><![CDATA[Branch wrote: This hit close to heart&#8230;..I have a very dear friend whose credit score before the Fico changes was 740.  She had late pays, a repo, you name it, due to debt incurred for her divorce.  It cost her quite a lot ($10,000.00+) to free herself from her ex, and he has not paid [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/credit-score-relationships.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-full wp-image-14" style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px;" title="credit score relationships" src="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/credit-score-relationships.jpg" alt="" width="165" height="119" /></a>Branch wrote:</strong> This hit close to heart&#8230;..I have a very dear friend whose credit score before the Fico changes was 740.  She had late pays, a repo, you name it, due to debt incurred for her divorce.  It cost her quite a lot ($10,000.00+) to free herself from her ex, and he has not paid a dime since the divorce over 2 years ago.</p>
<p>Anyway, she met and moved in with a man last year.  Recently, during his drinking times, the problem has arisen about credit.  He equates credit score with love.  She heard repeatedly that she was supposed to have her head on straight, good finances, blah, blah, blah.  When the worse finally came to be, she had obtained her score and showed him.  The change in him was amazing, to say the least.  Me, I would dump him in a heartbeat.  If my credit score (which is not good) was chosen over love, then I don&#8217;t need him.<br />
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<strong>Ford О. replied:</strong> Tammi,   It&#8217;s interesting you say this lol.  I know a guy that was getting in a relationship explaining that it was a business relationship as well, which seems very cold.  A relationship should be strictly out of love, trust and so much more&#8230;and I agree..but there&#8217;s also a fact out there that the number one reason people divorce is due to money.</p>
<p>It just puts so much stress on couples, it&#8217;s really sad when you think about that.  I truly think that couples should talk about finances and whats important to them.  This is one subject that I think most people don&#8217;t talk about.  My wife had 8 credit cards when we got married,and I had no idea.  She didn&#8217;t want me to know, but it wouldn&#8217;t have changed my mind about our relationship.</p>
<p>My wife wanted to pay her debt off and didn&#8217;t want me to help in any way and trust me, I tried.  She said she had the debt before we were married and it was her responsibility, so I thought that was very classy and I repsected her for it.  But money can rip couples apart if one&#8217;s a saver and one&#8217;s a spender&#8230;  I think it&#8217;s important to be on the same page and have the same goals.  Just my two cents&#8230;</p>
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		<title>apartment complex responded</title>
		<link>http://reniacarsillo.net/apartment-complex-responded/</link>
		<comments>http://reniacarsillo.net/apartment-complex-responded/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 23 Feb 2012 11:25:33 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description><![CDATA[Casey: I think I wrote to you guys previously ergarding a situation I had with my former apartment complex. I sent the apartment complex a letter requesting reciepts and a copy of the performance bond they reponded and sent me a copy of the performance bond that I signed, i dont remember signing it and [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><a href="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/apartment-complex.jpg"><img class="alignright size-full wp-image-11" style="margin: 0px 0px 10px 10px;" title="apartment-complex" src="http://reniacarsillo.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/apartment-complex.jpg" alt="" width="170" height="134" /></a>Casey:</strong> I think I wrote to you guys previously ergarding a situation I had with my former apartment complex.</p>
<p>I sent the apartment complex a letter requesting reciepts and a copy of the performance bond they reponded and sent me a copy of the performance bond that I signed, i dont remember signing it and they sent me a copy of the Apartment cleaning checklist that I signed, which listed the fees for the items they are charging me for<br />
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I don&#8217;t dispute the bill even though it&#8217;s high, what I am disputing is the performance bond if they file the claim, the performance bond goes in as a judgement against me, they have the right to takke my car, garnish my wages, etc..</p>
<p>The apartment complex says they will revise the bill from $2500 when someone moves in and they expect soemone to move in on 1/18/07, the bill probably will be reduced to abotu $1800</p>
<p>I dont know what to do? I don&#8217;t have $1800, I dont want them to take my car and take all my wages</p>
<p>my car is not totally owned by me, it is financed through a bank, so i am thinking that the owner is the bank since I make payments tot he bank if i i miss one payment the bank will reposess the car. does that mean the performance bond company cant take my car since I dont own it?</p>
<p>does anyone know anything about arizona laws? What amount of income is exempt from garnishment? I take home about $2000 a month after taxes.</p>
<p><strong>Billy:</strong> typically non secured debt is 10-15% of your take home.</p>
<p>They cannot take your car since you do not own said car.  That would be like someone repo&#8217;ing the apartment you are in for some other debt, you don&#8217;t own it, so they can&#8217;t take it.</p>
<p>What I would do since you don&#8217;t dispute the charges, is send them another letter, saying I can make $50 per month payments, or whatever, and send them a good faith check/money order.  I believe, and check with your state laws first, that once they accept a payment that&#8217;s agreement in this case</p>
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